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DREAMSCAPE

By

Shelley Robinson

<<Continued from chapter 2

 

Chapter 3--To Live or not to live

Aeryn sat on the porch swing looking out at the field of grass. John approached the stairs. As he stepped up on the first step, she acknowledged his presence.

Aeryn: (coldly) "How did you get here Crichton?"

He looked up at her. She was staring at him with her infamous PK glare.

John: "It is a long story."

Aeryn: "You can't stay. John will be back soon."

John: "I will take my chances."

Her glare watched him as he stepped up on the porch. He walked to the opposite end of the porch and sat on the railing. He crossed his arms and looked out at the scenery.

John: "This was one of my favorite places on Earth. I had some great times here with my dad."

Aeryn looked away.

Aeryn: "Crichton, why are you here?"

John: (distant look in his eyes)  "You are dying Aeryn. Your body is dying on Moya. I came in to get you to come back before it is too late."

Aeryn: "What if I don't want to go back?"

John's gazed snapped toward her. He slipped off the railing and walked toward her.

John: (voice rising in anger) "Is that what you want? You want to die."

She didn't answer him.

John: "Why don't you just put a pulse pistol to your head or do a kamikaze in your prowler?  Why take this easy way out?"

Aeryn: "You think this is easy?"

John: (sarcastically) "Sitting in the sun next to a beautiful lake with your dead lover by your side, oh yeah that is really tough Aeryn."

She stood up and tried to go back in the house. He blocked the door. She refused to make eye contact with him.

John: "I have never known you to be a quitter, not Ms. Bad ass Peacekeeper Soldier. When did you become such a coward?"

Aeryn: (shouting) "Go away and leave me alone."

John: "You mean let you die, don't you? That is what you want. You want me to leave you alone and let you die, right?"

She turned on her heels and ran down the porch stairs. John went after her. He grabbed her from behind. She fought him. He took a couple of shots from her but he got the upper hand. He pinned her to the ground beneath him. He held her arms over her head.

Aeryn: "Leave me alone."

John: "Not until you say it. Tell me that you too much of a coward to live so you have chosen to die."

Aeryn: (shouting) "Let go of me. I hate you."

The words stung John to his core but he was not going to let them distract him.

John: "Then hate me but I am not going to let you die Aeryn. Because if you die, you will surely take me with you."

She turned her head to the side so she didn't have to look at him.

John: "When you lose someone you love Aeryn giving up is easy, finding a way to go on is the hard part."

She swallowed hard. He felt the tension from her struggling easing up slightly. At least she was listening.

John: "I know you are afraid."

Aeryn: (staring up at him) "I am not afraid. I am a soldier. I have faced death many times."

John: "Really? How did it feel?"

Aeryn: "What?"

John: "How did it feel sitting next to me while my life slipped away knowing that there was nothing that you could do? I was going to die no matter how badly you wanted, needed me to live."

Aeryn: (anger filled her) "You bastard."

She fought to push him off of her. She was crying but she was fighting him. She finally got him off of her. She stood up. John was on his knees looking up at her. She was shouting.

Aeryn: "You promised! You promised you wouldn't leave me behind but you did!"

Her tears were flowing. She was staring down at John.

John: "It hurts to be mad at him, doesn't it?"

She was silent.

John: "He left you behind and you are furious with him. You left me behind and now you are doing it again."

She dropped to her knees in front of him. They stared into each other's eyes.

John: "When you left on Talyn with him, I missed you so much and the only thing that kept me going from day to day was my love for you. I wouldn't let myself think about the possibility of you and he..."

John lowered his eyes. She reached out and laid her hand on top of his head. He looked up at her.

John: "When I found out Talyn was coming back all I could think about was seeing that face again...(he reached up and gently stroked her cheek)...that beautiful face."

He stood up. Aeryn looked up at him.

John: "Do you know what it does to me to know that you would rather live in this make believe world with a ghost, a figment of your imagination, instead of with me in the real world?  May be you would have been happier if I had been the one to die."

He turned his back to her. A single tear ran down her cheek. Aeryn stood up and walked up behind him. She slowly reached her hand out and gently stroked John's back. He stiffened at her touch but he didn't turn around.

Aeryn: (tears streaming down her face) "I didn't mean what I said. I don't hate you."

John: "You know I didn't ask to be dropped into this crazy Universe of yours. But I am here and I am finding my way but only with the help of my friends and ..."

He turned around and faced her.

John: "And you. You are my guide. The one constant in my life that makes everything else bearable."

The sound of those words coming from this John as they did from the other John touched her heart. John stepped closer to her. He stared into her eyes.

John: "I don't know how to convince you to live Aeryn, except to say that I love you. And if any part of you still loves me, you have to fight for me because I am fighting like hell for you."

He leaned in and laid his forehead against hers. He looked in her eyes and laid his hand against her cheek wiping away her tears.

John: "It is your choice Aeryn."

He moved passed her and walked away. She turned and watched him go. She swallowed hard as if forcing her emotions down and turned back towards the house.

*****

Dreamscape chapter 4 >>
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